Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Reflection and Projection

Days are speeding by at the speed of lightning. I sleep, work and eat, but otherwise I'm constantly searching for extra moments to read, relax, and attempt to figure out the structure of my consciousness. On top of the pleasurable activities that I enjoy, and don't seem to have enough time for, there are important errands that seem to perpetually end up on the back-burner. I need a haircut (this coming from a guy, who sported a ponytail for nearly fifteen years); my car is months overdue for an oil change; there are bill on my desk that have made the move to my new abode without yet being paid.

There is some serious sunshine filling the atmosphere surrounding this house. Nice weather and quiet spaces are calling to me, pleading with me to ignore the need for a paycheck and kick back with a good book today. A good book in this case translates to David Simon's true crime tome Homicide. I've started it, but don't really think of myself as reading it since I'm only twenty pages in. Lately my mind is being drawn to dark subject matter such as Homicide and the cause behind murderous acts of war. It's sunny outside, but inside my brain I'm still shining the torch on the dark corners. I have a feeling that I'll always be examining these dark corners of my psyche, trying my best to fit Yin and Yang together.

I have one more disc of the BBC series "Life on Mars" to watch. Before I can watch the final two episodes, my Significant Other's son has to catch up with the last two discs. It's been a fun series, and I'll be sorry not to have any more episodes to look forward to. Near the top of my Netflix queue is the film version of Neville Shute's On the Beach, which I'm quite anxious to see after recently finishing the book. I decided to make the novel my featured staff pick for April. I also have the "Coup de Torchon" (U.S. title: "Clean Slate") to watch, which is Bernard Tavernier's adaptation of Jim Thompson's Pop. 1280. I saw the film version upon its initial release to theaters way back in 1982. I was impressed when I first viewed it, but I'm looking forward to watching it after recently reading the pulp novel that it was based on.

Other than constantly looking for spare hours to fill with pleasurable activities, life is good. I have a strong feeling that the speed at which life seems to be speeding by is in direct proportion to the increase in my overall happiness. This much happiness is a new thing for me. This new feeling is going to take some getting used to. I'm so used to diving into a ditch and examining my dark side for weeks at a time. Appropriately enough, Spring brings along feelings of renewal and rebirth.

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